HOORAY FOR ME! I finally have a fucking BLARRG like millions of other narcissistic idiots out there...

I will be filling it with all sorts of nonsense that I personally find amusing, disgusting, entertaining and most likely a little boring. I may even use it as a platform to subject you to my personal artwork, just like EVERY other miserable, aspiring artist out there in internet land. I can't guarantee that it will be an enjoyable experience for you - what I CAN guarantee is that it won't change the world in anyway shape or form.

In fact, I feel kinda sorry for you for stumbling onto this little speck on the World Wide Web, with millions of BLOGS and PORN WEBSITES vying for your precious time, you're wasting it here reading dopey shit. GO AWAY! Do something productive...make a sandwich, build a blanket fort, sit on the toilet and actually read a BOOK...Christ, do anything but hang around here.

That being said, if you have accidentally stumbled onto this site, feel free to poke around and make a comment or two if so inclined. Maybe I'll respond...or not, depends on my mood that day.

I look forward to wasting your time. -KEMO

Monday, October 12, 2015

Madison Avenue takes on Halloween...and is lame.

I'm phoning this post in today, and I don't feel sorry at all. I warned you not to waste your time reading or viewing my drivel. I had a shitty day at work and I'm not feeling inspired to put forth any real effort to entertain you with Halloween Radness...so today you get Halloween Lameness.

Here are a couple of vintage ads I found online that are pretty much 'meh' (except for the first 2)


Love the artwork/layout of this one so I broke down and shared it with you guys...don't get used to it.


...well, I liked this one too, so sue me.


A perfect example of ...'meh'


I'm calling total bullshit on this scene...when did THIS ever happen to you as a kid? I'll tell you when...NEVER!


Cracker Jacks suck on Halloween, and anyone who disagrees is a lying bastard. I got them as a kid, and they sucked! They were always stale and I always traded them with my brother for his Oh Henry Bars...or Mounds because I like coconut. 


Dear Lord do I hate fucking Candy Corn and all the variants there are...Brach's Schmach's, you suck.


This kid looks terrified, he really doesn't want to take any but the lonely housewife who is handing out the candy is wearing a see through nighty, and let's face it - a guy will do ANYTHING for a pair of boobies.


I beg to differ. Bubble Yum was the perfect gum, at least you could blow a bubble the size of your head with it...you can't blow a proper bubble with Wrigley's Spearmint, so kiss my ass Wrigley's, you gum imposter.


OK...who the hell hands out CEREAL on Halloween?!! Sure it's covered in sugar...if yer lucky. I always got a box of Rice Krispies and felt like fucking Charlie Brown when he gets a rock.


I say we egg your Goddamn house lady...where the hell are the Sugar Daddies, Pixie Stix, Root Beer Bottle caps, those friggin' wax bottles with the colored sugar water inside them?!!


LAME. Wanna impress me Kool-aid? Make Pumpkin flavored Kool-aid and not try to fake it by selling me Orange or Tangerine flavored shit.


Yeah...whatever Aunt Jemima.


It is a proven fact that Hunt's Catsup sucks and is a cheap watery knockoff of Heinz KETCHUP!
Hey Hunt's, make it with real cats and I may try it.


What's this ad REALLY trying to say?...If you drink enough of this shitastic beer, any old witch will turn into this hot piece of ass? You are a clever one Anheuser-Busch.


Happy Halloweenie!
Do I really need to say anything here?...It's too easy. Yeah sure, your Goblins will gobble them up alright.


Jesus Christ, my lip is bleeding right now. 

Be sure to get Skinless Weiners Everyone!




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