HOORAY FOR ME! I finally have a fucking BLARRG like millions of other narcissistic idiots out there...

I will be filling it with all sorts of nonsense that I personally find amusing, disgusting, entertaining and most likely a little boring. I may even use it as a platform to subject you to my personal artwork, just like EVERY other miserable, aspiring artist out there in internet land. I can't guarantee that it will be an enjoyable experience for you - what I CAN guarantee is that it won't change the world in anyway shape or form.

In fact, I feel kinda sorry for you for stumbling onto this little speck on the World Wide Web, with millions of BLOGS and PORN WEBSITES vying for your precious time, you're wasting it here reading dopey shit. GO AWAY! Do something productive...make a sandwich, build a blanket fort, sit on the toilet and actually read a BOOK...Christ, do anything but hang around here.

That being said, if you have accidentally stumbled onto this site, feel free to poke around and make a comment or two if so inclined. Maybe I'll respond...or not, depends on my mood that day.

I look forward to wasting your time. -KEMO

Monday, September 14, 2015

William Wallace Denslow meets Mother Goose

I'm sure there may be a few of you out there that aren't familiar with one of my favorite children's book illustrators, William Wallace Denslow. I'm sure you've seen his artwork before if you read, The Wonderful Wizard of Oz. It still stands as one of the most lavishly illustrated children's book of all time, and one of my personal favorites. But I'm not here to chat about their work together on that particular book. I wanna share one of my favorite illustrated versions of Mother Goose that he did right after his falling out with Frank L. Baum in 1901. His version of Mother Goose Nursery Rhymes is unparalleled in it's sheer volume of illustrations for the forty plus rhymes contained in this edition...and I'm gonna share it with you right now.


Back & Front Cover


End Papers




On the same day he officially divorced his first wife Annie McCartney, February 20, 1896, Denslow married Anne Waters Holden...She filed for divorce in September 1903, alleging that he told her in June 1901 that he did not love her and henceforth declined to live with her. Denslow was quite the guy.


Disturbing to say the least...but delightful.


I have nightmares sometimes that I'm being chased by little egg men...


Just for the record, it never states that he was an egg...Denslow added that at the end for some reason.


Aside from the poor text placement, this one reminds me of the ending to the original 1960's Little Shop of Horrors.


Did he rewrite this to make it seem like the rabbit got away to make it less violent? I guess it's ok for the baby to freeze to death.


Little Jack Horner is your typical creepy looking Denslow kid...and I don't think that's a plum on his finger. I'm just saying.


I believe they were diddlers, NOT fiddlers. How else can you explain Old King Cole's merriment?


Hey Little Boy who lives in the lane...how about you get your own damn sheep?!


Ummmm, that's not the letter I was taught! It's supposed to be 'K', everyone knows that.


This rhyme escaped me as a child - NEVER heard this one before, AND the kid is creepy as hell!


Poor pig doesn't realize he's gonna be bacon, REAL soon.


...sure it will.


Here is a picture of my wife as a young girl.


I always thought it was 'Hickory Dickory Dock'...


Another one that I believe Denslow changed up a bit, I thought it was 'Rock-a-Bye Baby'...


How about keeping your legs closed.


OK...I'd be remiss if I was being honest for a second and said this one made me laugh out loud. Not only have I NEVER heard this one before...I've never seen this illustration before! AND something tells me this one will be 'lost' if they ever decide to reprint this book.


Little Arthur looks like a pompous spoiled brat that needs his ass smacked.


Acid trip in 3... 2 ... 1...


Arrrrgh! That text layout!


Another rhyme lost to the ages...THANK GOD.


I'm sure she does, depending on how long she rides that horse.


Possible Campbell Soup kid's mother?


I can't tell by this illustration who is having more fun...The King of Hearts OR The Knave of Hearts.


Little Bo-Peep looks like she has bigger issues to deal with other than lost sheep.


This is one of my favorite illustrations in this book - but the placement and color of the text drives me up the wall.


This one makes absolutely no friggin' sense whatsoever. Aren't victuals FOOD? What else would she live upon?!! And why is she so loud?...


The Pieman looks as though he's gonna throttle Simon with the pie...


The illustration on the right side bugs the shit outta me, I'm trying to figure out the reasoning behind the hideous avocado green 'box' behind Little Miss Muffet?! The look on his face makes me wonder if he has his hand in his pants.


Mother poisoned the butter.


Mary looks like a 40 year old dwarf...another creepy Denslow kid.


Why DOES the lamb love Mary so?...hmmmmmmm.


It's because he does modeling for Dutch Boy Paints.


Copper groat?...


As a child I never believed you could put someone in a pumpkin shell, and I still don't.


We all know that Jill pushed Jack down the hill...who are we kidding. Once again, some more hideous Denslow children.


I remember this rhyme from when I was a little kid. The illustrated version I had back then was CREEPY as hell and used to freak me out...but I kept staring at it. I'll need to track it down and share it with you guys.


What the hell is the moon looking at?!


Here's another one we'll never see again in our PC world...


Never heard this one until now.


...and to think all this time I thought Jack was a boy who jumped over the candlestick...aren't you a clever one Denslow!


I learned it as 'Rub-a-dub dub, three men in a tub'...Oh well.


My son John is an idiot.


Sounds like white people problems to me...


Huh?!


Those of you into type and graphic design, this is pretty cool.


End Papers

Well, I hope you enjoyed these illustrations as much as I did - I think they have a delightful charm to them - sometimes creepy, disturbing and racist, but most of the time they are sweet and sentimental. But do me a favor, if you have children of your own or know of any you could borrow, be sure to share these with them, sit down and read them together and have a laugh or two. I have found that most children born after 1980 have absolutely no clue who 'Mother Goose' was OR can recite more 2 of these ditties. 

It's really sad when you think about it.



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